Sharon Van Etten making me bawl, weep, and cry like a lil' emotional shit rn tbh.
Been feeling so drawn towards the album "Because I Was In Love" lately...
Suddenly seeing / finally realising and appreciating the (agonising) beauty behind the music, everything...
It's been on repeat quite a lot lately... helps to calm the nerves and soothes me...

If I could stuff an entire album into a new late night mix this would definitely be the one...
Actually... I should create a late night mix full of albums next, instead of just songs... just thought of another one or two that would make the cut... like, a comprehensive LIST of albums...
Hmm... sounds like a plan.

I also love how I started doing/curating my monthly playlists on Spotify... really helps to keep track of not just what I'm listening to, but is also a somewhat accurate way of documenting things on a day-to-day basis, in a way? Like, memories/feelings associated with the specific artists that I've been listening to... hmm. Yes.

As of late, these two albums have been on repeat:

- Because I Was In Love (Sharon Van Etten)
- III (BADBADNOTGOOD)

Previously, earlier this month, it was mostly Hinds, Twin Peaks, and Braids.

Ahh... what a therapeutic process... curating monthly personal playlists...
Come to think of it, actually, blogging/writing in detail about the artists I've been actively listening to for the month is also quite therapeutic... like, it's a definite way of documenting what I've been listening to and hence, too, what were the memories and thoughts and feelings that accompanied them...

I feel so helpless... so alone...
I don't know.
I feel like I'm gonna burst...
I need to let so many things out... else I'm going to explode or something...
But on the other hand I can't...
Ugh I hate this feeling...
This sucks, so much...
Sigh
Sigh
Sigh
Keep it together, Josh
Keep it together.

You have to be strong; remember that.
You have to be strong; keep telling yourself that.
You have to be strong; not just for yourself, but for the sake of others as well.
Be strong.
Try.

Sigh